How many years have you been setting a goal to set better boundaries? Year after year, you promise yourself this one will be different. This year, you will say no, set limits, and finally start that passion project, hobby, or business idea.
Cut to reality: when January 31st hits, you think: “I can’t believe it, another year and I’m over-scheduled and exhausted.” You reach for another cup of coffee and wander over to social media, burnt out, craving an ounce of joy.
People with ADHD struggle with overcommitment. They feel powerless because they cannot slow down, set boundaries, or prioritize their own needs. But what if this year were different? What if this was the year you started at “inbox zero,” went on date nights with your spouse, or left work at 5 pm? Let’s look at why overcommitment is such an issue for adults with ADHD and explore commonly overlooked ways to change.
Why do people with ADHD overcommit?
1. A high-achieving mindset. Many people with ADHD aim to get a plus A+. Part of this has to do with the need to please 
others while growing up. When you are born into a world, you develop a burning desire to succeed. This urge lives in many people with ADHD and causes them to try to “outwork” themselves to please others or meet their
goals.
2. Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD). Many people with ADHD experience RSD, an intense wordless pain associated with expecting or experiencing rejection. Because the ADHD brain struggles to regulate emotions, it also struggles to regulate its response to criticism. To avoid the pain of negative feedback, many people with ADHD say yes to everything and no to nothing.
3. Impulsivity. Part of having ADHD means struggling with self-control. This can look like excessive shopping, being fidgety, or blurting things out in conversation. So when your boss asks you to stay late, you might say yes out of sheer impulse.
4. Time blindness. Another part of having ADHD is being “blind to time.” You can get wrapped up in a task for hours and lose sight of other essential things. When you over-commit, you might genuinely forget how busy you actually are.
How to Stop Over-committing in 2026
Master the Pause
The simplest way to gain control over your actions is with a pause. Even a moment helps. Before responding, count to ten. Walk away. Take five deep breaths. Practice building a tiny wall between emotion and response.
Gain More Comfort in Setting Boundaries
People with ADHD are uncomfortable setting boundaries. Not because they don’t know how to set them, but because of the guilt they feel. To put a boundary, you need to fight back against guilt. Boundaries aren’t aggressive or cruel. They are acts of self-respect and self-love. Without boundaries, you become a doormat. The result is becoming weathered and torn apart. This year, try standing firm in your boundaries by owning them. Setting boundaries is the right thing to do for your well-being.
Practice the 24-Hour Rule
When someone asks something of most people with ADHD, they become overwhelmed with emotion. The fear of rejection wells up inside of you, and you say yes. This year, before you agree to anything new, please give it 24 hours. Time off between emotion and response will provide the emotional mind time to settle.
Schedule Time and Space
Take charge of your schedule; don’t just react to it—schedule barriers between yourself and your commitments.
First, schedule downtime, anything that helps you wind down. Video games. Naps. Running. Whatever shifts you from “go go” to “slow down.” Next, personal space. This is a block of time in your week reserved for yourself—no tasks, no favors, no productivity goals. If you’re someone who over-commits, this may feel uncomfortable at first. When you notice the urge to fill it by doing something for someone else, pause. Drop into yourself and ask, “What do I need right now?” What would help me feel more grounded or on top of my life?
Please be aware that you don’t use this time to take care of others. This space is intentionally, unapologetically, for you.
Find an ADHD Therapist
Overcommitment is a sign of deeper underlying distress. Sometimes, people with ADHD have had challenging life experiences that make saying no or setting boundaries deeply uncomfortable. When tips and tricks don’t seem to get the job done, an ADHD therapist can develop a more individualized plan to help you better manage your time.
Key Takeaways
- Overcommitment is associated with people with ADHD.
- People with ADHD over-commit because of sensitivity to rejection, impulse control issues, and a high achiever’s mindset.
- The best way to manage overcommitment is to be proactive about building space for yourself. However, managing guilt that drives setting boundaries and taking space is key.
Begin Adult ADHD Treatment in Columbus, Ohio
Looking for more individualized support? You don’t have to live a life impacted by big feelings at work. ADHD-focused therapy can help you find mental calm. Our counseling practice in Columbus, Ohio, has caring therapists who specialize in ADHD testing and treatment. To start your counseling journey with Focused Mind ADHD Counseling, follow these simple steps:
- Fill out the contact form to schedule a free 15-minute phone consultation.
- Meet with one of our caring therapists.
- Stop feeling like your life is controlling you. Start controlling your life.
Other ADHD Services Offered at Focused Mind ADHD Counseling
Adult ADHD treatment is not the only service we offer at our Columbus, OH counseling practice. At Focused Mind ADHD Counseling, we offer a variety of mental health services, including ADHD testing. As an adult with ADHD, you may also benefit from ADHD testing, anxiety treatment for ADHD, counseling for men with ADHD, counseling for women with ADHD, couples therapy for ADHD, or depression counseling for ADHD. You can also view our blog for more resources and helpful info.
About the Author
Billy Roberts, LISW-S, LCSW, is a licensed psychotherapist and ADHD expert in Columbus, Ohio, specializing in ADD/ADHD in adults. He has been seen in TimeMagazine, CNN, HuffPost, and Forbes discussing his unique approach to ADHD-focused therapy. See Full Bio.
