Does life with ADHD feel like an emotional roller coaster? You’re not alone. According to a recent study, almost all people with ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder) struggle with emotional-regulation issues. While some people with ADHD have big emotions that are noticeable (because they “wear their hearts on their sleeves”), others suffer in silence over the intense stress they’re holding inside. As a result, some get told they are “too sensitive” one day and are “totally closed off” the next. Whatever the case, for many adults with ADHD and emotional-regulation issues, life can feel like a roller coaster of overwhelm, leaving them feeling misunderstood.
The Neurological Link Between ADHD and Emotional-Regulation Issues
The ADHD brain holds the secret to ADHD and emotional-regulation issues. In the ADHD brain, the executive functions work differently than non-ADHD brains. Executive functions are housed in the prefrontal cortex, a region located in the front of the brain. These functions include working memory, the ability to focus in the moment, planning ahead, organization, and emotional regulation. Here are some specific ways emotional regulation itself is impacted:
- Overstimulation: Because the ADHD brain struggles to filter out distractions, it can get overstimulated. If what’s happening is emotionally triggering, it can all feel like too much and just…go boom.
- Self-Regulation: The frontal lobe also controls self-regulation. That means the response to your emotions might be bigger than if you didn’t have ADHD.
- Delayed Emotional Processing: ADHD brains are forgetful, which means they might forget
parts of what happened in the past. This could mean the brain leaves out information when recalling something, leading to larger emotions.
The Behavioral Impact of ADHD and Emotional Dysregulation
Emotional dysregulation impacts your actions. When many people with ADHD have big feelings, their reactions to those feelings can be just as big.
Here are some common ways ADHD and emotional dysregulation impacts behavior:
● Avoiding social situations due to fear of rejection
● Difficulty sustaining relationships due to burning bridges
● Having low frustration tolerance with friends and family (e.g. snapping at your kids often, overreacting to your spouse “out of nowhere”)
● Being criticized at work for getting verbally frustrated with your coworkers, boss, etc.
● Going from “zero to ninety” in general
The Internal Impact of Big Emotions in ADHD
Not everyone’s struggles with emotional dysregulation are clear cut. Some ADHDers with emotional dysregulation suffer in silence. For example, depression creates a lot of sadness. But when you have ADHD, you struggle to regulate that sadness. While the impact of your ADHD on depression isn’t noticeable per se, the severity at which you feel sad is more intense when you have ADHD.
You might not consider “shutting down” an act of emotional dysregulation. But the “the ADHD shutdown” (when someone with ADHD’s emotions get so big they have no choice but to detach or withdraw from the feeling) is an effort to regulate emotions. The point is, shutting down doesn’t look like overreacting, but closing off to the world might create just as many issues in an ADHD person’s life.
Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria
Many adults with ADHD also have rejection sensitive dysphoria (RSD). This is the pain and fear of actual or perceived negative feedback. As a result, anticipating or experiencing criticism can cause big emotions that trigger avoidance or overreactions. RSD is partly due to having a hypersensitive ADHD brain.
Coping with the Emotional-Regulation Roller Coaster
Managing big emotions with ADHD takes work, but a life of calm is possible.
Here are some strategies commonly learned in ADHD and emotional-regulation therapy:
● Learn to label and process emotions
● Identify triggers for strong emotions and cope ahead
● Learn to calm big emotions through mindfulness, meditation, etc. (meditation apps like the CALM app can help)
● Manage stress in life overall (you know, set boundaries, self-care, all that fun stuff 🙂)
● Find ways to effectively communicate your emotions to others (e.g. using non-judgemental language, etc.)
To sum it all up:
● Emotional regulation is a big part of life with ADHD
● ADHD impacts the brain’s executive functions (which includes emotional regulation)
● Emotional regulation can affect people with ADHD’s actions and their inner experience
● Emotional dysregulation can lead to worse anxiety, depression, and shutting down
● Coping with emotional dysregulation is possible with learning tools to identify, process, and cope with big emotions
Begin Adult ADHD Treatment in Columbus, Ohio
Looking for more individualized support? You don’t have to feel so dysregulated and overwhelmed. ADHD-focused therapy can help you unlock your thinking brain in the midst of intense situations. Our counseling practice in Columbus, Ohio has caring therapists who specialize in ADHD testing and ADHD treatment. To start your counseling journey with Focused Mind ADHD Counseling, follow these simple steps:
● Fill out the contact form to schedule a free 15-minute phone consultation.
● Meet with one of our caring therapists.
● Stop feeling dysregulated. Start finding self-control.
Other ADHD Services Offered at Focused Mind ADHD Counseling
Adult ADHD treatment is not the only service we offer at our Columbus, OH counseling practice. At Focused Mind ADHD Counseling, we offer a variety of mental health services, including ADHD testing. As an adult with ADHD, we know you may also benefit from anxiety treatment for ADHD, counseling for men with ADHD, or depression counseling for ADHD. You can also view our blog for more resources and helpful info!
