Wondering about undiagnosed Attention Deficit hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) in adult women? You’ve noticed a hard truth: ADHD has been considered a “male problem” for far too long. You may have even known boys growing up who got diagnosed because of their “behavioral issues.” But what about the young girl in class––the one not acting out, but who was daydreaming, restless, and using perfectionism to cover up her forgetfulness? Whatever happened to her?
Well, things in her adult life got real. Once she added a career, kids, and the chaos of adulting…her focus suffered. She had a lot of ideas but no time to follow through. She gets even more sidetracked when she’s with her family, which fills her with intense guilt when she isn’t more attentive. Because society expects the world from her, she quickly converts her focusing struggles into being endlessly self-critical.
But here’s the twist: while you might be familiar with the classic ADHD symptoms (forgetfulness, disorganization, procrastination, impulsivity), you might not realize that ADHD also causes not-so-obvious ADHD symptoms, particularly in women. Knowing the commonly overlooked signs of undiagnosed ADHD in adult women can help lead to a more accurate diagnosis.
Five Commonly Overlooked Signs of Adult ADHD in Women
Ineffective Treatment for Anxiety
50% of people with ADHD have an anxiety disorder. It makes sense when you think about it. Many people with ADHD worry about their ability to get things done. They worry about forgetting, and they worry about how long it’s taking to get their projects completed. So it’s no wonder you’ve been talking about it in therapy. But why hasn’t therapy or medication been completely effective? Well, if the underlying ADHD is never addressed, you might find yourself learning the same old coping skills for a long, long time.
Perfectionism
ADHD traits cause forgetfulness and distraction, which can lead to mistakes. Growing up, many girls learn to “mask” their ADHD, wishing not to be singled out as being different. Perfectionism is one example of ADHD masking as a means of survival. It’s used as a way to avoid the criticism and rejection that many girls fear (or have experienced) in the face of making mistakes or missing the mark.
Self-doubt
ADHD works at an unconscious level. Many people with ADHD don’t know when their next missed appointment or loss of motivation will strike. As a result, they often report feeling an intense sting when criticism is experienced. Interestingly, this happens so often there is a word for it: rejection sensitive dysphoria (RSD), which is the ADHD-specific experience of intensely fearing criticism.
Emotional Dysregulation
Many women are shocked to realize that emotional dysregulation is a symptom of ADHD. The ADHD brain struggles to self-regulate, which includes recognizing and regulating emotions. This might look like feeling emotions in a bigger way than others, experiencing intense empathy and taking on the emotions of others, or having random outbursts of frustration (going from zero to ninety).
Toxic Guilt
Some guilt is “adaptive,” meaning that it serves a purpose. Other guilt is toxic, which means it brings you down. Many women with ADHD feel toxic guilt…and just have a hard time putting themselves first. Part one of this comes from society expecting women to be superhuman. Part two comes from internalizing the criticism from a world built for someone else.
To Sum it Up:
- ADHD impacts women differently than men.
- ADHD is often overlooked in girls and women.
- Understanding the typical ADHD traits as well as the hidden ADHD traits leads to a more accurate diagnosis.
Begin Adult ADHD Testing in Columbus, OH
Wondering if you have ADHD? You don’t have to live your life feeling scattered without knowing why. Comprehensive ADHD testing can help you find answers. Our Columbus, OH counseling practice has caring therapists who specialize in ADHD Treatment. To start your counseling journey, follow these simple steps:
- Fill out the contact form to schedule a free 15-minute phone consultation.
- Meet with one of our caring therapists.
- Stop putting yourself last. Start putting yourself first.
Other ADHD Services Offered at Focused Mind ADHD Counseling:
Adult ADHD testing is not the only service we offer at our Columbus, OH counseling practice. At Focused Mind ADHD Counseling, we offer a variety of mental health services, including ADHD treatment. As an adult with ADHD, we know you may also benefit from ADHD counseling, anxiety treatment for ADHD, counseling for men with ADHD, couples therapy for ADHD, or depression counseling for ADHD. You can also view our blog for more resources and helpful info!
