Megan made an offhand remark, “You forgot again?” and Daniel began to shut down. Inside, he was filled with panic. And then shame. “What’s the point of even trying?” he thought. On the outside, Megan saw him sink into himself. The emotional disconnect lingered, and neither of them could find their way back to each other that night. Once they began ADHD-focused couples therapy in Columbus, Ohio, they discovered that Daniel wasn’t just being “too sensitive,” he was experiencing something deeper: Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria.
What is Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria?
Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD) is a deep, often wordless, emotional pain experienced by people with Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD). RSD is triggered when people with ADHD anticipate or experience criticism or perceived rejection. It’s not just taking things personally; RSD is based in the ADHD nervous system.
Because the ADHD brain impacts self-regulation, including emotional regulation, it also affects how people with ADHD regulate their emotional response to being criticized. The emotional pain of RSD is so big that people with ADHD need significant ways to cope. For some, they completely avoid situations that might involve criticism. For others, they might shut down and avoid sharing their true feelings (because what’s more vulnerable than that?).
The RSD Cycle in Relationships:
- The Trigger: Often a disagreement or piece of criticism
- Internal Spiral: Feeling “unlovable” or “like a failure”
- Coping Mechanisms: Shutting down, avoidance, perfectionism, and/or defensiveness
- Unintended Impact on Relationships: May lead to conflict avoidance and a lack of intimacy
How Couples Therapy in Columbus, Ohio Helps with RSD:
- Normalizing and Naming RSD: Couples therapy can help you notice RSD patterns. Giving a name to RSD in the moment helps to break through the emotional disconnect.
- Teach Partners Co-Regulation Skills: Couples therapy in Columbus Ohio helps couples become more emotionally aligned. This might include learning to listen, validate, and “pause and repair,” so that communication improves.
- Getting Back on the Same Page: ADHD relationships—like many others—sometimes need help getting both partners back on the same page. Couples therapy offers a space to reconnect, rebuild trust, and find the common ground that strengthens relationship satisfaction.
Learning to Repair
Ultimately, couples therapy helps you repair connections when broken. Megan learned that RSD didn’t mean her relationship was “doomed.” Rather, it meant they needed the tools to navigate the emotional map of their particular ADHD relationship. Couples therapy for ADHD is a place to put all the pieces of your relationship back together.
Key Takeaways 
- Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD) is common in ADHD.
- RSD causes intense emotional pain when rejection is anticipated.
- People with ADHD often cope with RSD by shutting down, which negatively impacts connection and intimacy.
Start ADHD-Focused Couples Therapy in Columbus, OH
Looking for more individualized support? You don’t have to lack connection as a couple.
ADHD-focused couples counseling can help improve communication. Our counseling practice in Columbus, Ohio has caring therapists who specialize in ADHD testing and ADHD treatment. To start your counseling journey with Focused Mind ADHD Counseling, follow these simple steps:
- Fill out the contact form to schedule a free 15-minute phone consultation.
- Meet with one of our caring therapists.
- Stop feeling stuck. Start feeling seen.
Other ADHD Services Offered at Focused Mind ADHD Counseling
ADHD-focused couples counseling is not the only service we offer at our Columbus, OH counseling practice. At Focused Mind ADHD Counseling, we offer a variety of mental health services, including ADHD testing. As an adult with ADHD, we know you may also benefit from adult ADHD treatment, anxiety treatment for ADHD, counseling for menwith ADHD, adult ADHD treatment, or depression counseling for ADHD. You can also view our blog for more resources!
